Ode to a full timer

Attention to orders:

The Active Guard and Reserve Medal of Honor is presented to MAJ Smedlap.

For exceptionally meritorious service on Saturday afternoon at drill.

Saturday afternoon, clipboard in hand, MAJ Smedlap was conducting an inspection of a hand grenade class in the armory, when without warning, a live grenade landed at his feet.

Without a moment's hesitation and with complete disregard for the safety of others, MAJ Smedlap threw the closest m day soldier, PFC Snuffy, on top of the grenade and exited the area in a rapid fashion so as not to mess up his uniform.

Following the explosion and only after verifying the coast was clear and no further grenades would land at his feet, MAJ Smedlap organized a detail of m day soldiers to clean up the armory and tend to the survivors.  His rapid actions resulted in a minimum of effort required of anyone on full time status having to spend any part of their four day work week cleaning up m dayer's messes.

MAJ Smedlap's actions resulted in an additional full time PFC slot becoming available in the unit, as well as the preservation of the integrity of the command structure of the unit, the continuity of everyone's full time jobs, and MOST IMPORTANTLY, his retirement package.

MAJ Smedlap's actions are in keeping with the greatest traditions of the cool guys in full time jobs, the active guard and reserve system, and the US Army.

Small hooah.